You can't remove the darkness from a room...

...but you can fill it with light!

I've been obsessed with those words since they were spoken by performing artist Lindsey Stirling at a concert Carol and I attended last Saturday.

Firstly, I recognize the issues I'm about to discuss are "1st world" in nature and pale in comparison to the truly serious issues faced by so many people in this world.  I share this in the hope that the coping mechanisms explained below may be of assistance.

The last few weeks have been a bit difficult for me. I've traveled five out of the last six weeks. Three of those trips involved a Saturday or Sunday, or both, and all were three days or more in duration. Meeting timings, time zone differences and flight availability conspired to require an extra night's stay on three of the trips as options to fly east across the country in the late afternoon are limited. Adding insult to injury, the late afternoon meeting or event that necessitated the extra overnight was canceled or shortened on two of those three trips so that I could have made it back that evening had I known those changes would occur.

Each trip was productive and well worth the travel, but those of you that travel frequently for business understand the grind can catch up with you. I missed Carol, I missed riding my bike, I missed our friends, I missed our house, I missed my own bed...

I found it interesting that I never questioned my decision to un-retire. As I said in my last blog entry, my "Why" is too strong for that. But, I'll admit to being run-down, grumpy and very short on patience.

Back to the words: "You can't remove the darkness from a room, but you can add light." 

Let me set the stage so you have the context in which these words were spoken and why they took on such significance.

Carol and I love Lindsey Stirling.  We had seen her perform on two previous occasions and I knew immediately that a third was in our future when I received an announcement a few months ago that she was touring with Evanescence, another favorite group, accompanied by a full orchestra!

I went on-line immediately to book local tickets. But, all her shows in the PA, NY, and DC area were during my already planned travels. Arrrggghhhh!  I logged off disappointed and dejected. Damned travel... I soon forgot about it and moved on.

Fast forward to our 40th wedding anniversary last month. No surprise, but I was going to be out-of-town on the big day, so we celebrated the prior weekend. I wanted to surprise Carol with something special and remembered the Lindsey/Evanescence tour.  I went back and studied their future dates for a possible road trip and found last weekend's performance in West Palm Beach, FL that fit into our schedules. I scored a couple of awesome seats, booked flights & hotel for an extended weekend, and presented the package to a very surprised Carol. Mission accomplished!

The only potential downside?  The venue was an outdoor amphitheater in south Florida in August...

It was an oppressive evening to say the least. The ambient temperature was in the high 80F's with a dew point of 77F yielding a heat index of over 100F at concert time. Add to that several thousand people crammed together under a metal roof trapping body heat and blocking any breeze. It was ugly. I was dripping just sitting in my seat doing absolutely nothing.

Then Lindsey Stirling hit the stage with her incredibly high energy performance.  Take a look...

Her entire 90 minute show was comprised of this level of activity!

She stopped to cheerfully chat with the audience after about 30 minutes and we could see the sweat pouring off of her.  She revealed she started the show wearing three layers of costumes!  I clearly had no reason to complain about being uncomfortable.

Lindsey went on to tell us about a very dark time in her life when she was struggling with anorexia and depression. She hated the person she had become and considered herself a massive failure with no future potential. Thankfully, with the help of family and friends, she realized something was wrong and sought professional help before something catastrophic happened.

She realized that she could not simply remove the negative feelings and self doubt.  However, over time she learned that if she worked hard enough at it, she could overwhelm them if she focused on positive experiences.  She knows the darkness is still within her, but she has learned she can keep it from manifesting itself as long as she purposely and habitually focuses on filling her mind with positive thoughts.  You can read more about her story here.

"You can't remove the darkness from a room, but you can fill it with light"

This provided me a whole new perspective on negativity. Don't focus on removing or avoiding it, just overwhelm it with positivism!

I've always been a "glass is half full" person.  In fact, many would call me an eternal optimist.  But, while I may personally tend towards the positive, it doesn't mean that negativity from outside influences can't work it's way into my psyche.

Travel issues have always been a source of negativity for me.  Scan my social media accounts and you'll find that a vast majority of the negative posts have been influenced by a travel experience. The airlines, TSA, and airport personnel in general just do not understand the horrible customer experience they create.

In addition, I've been increasingly influenced by other forms of negativity recently as so much of the world around us has turned to negativity and hatefulness. It's happening on all sides of the political spectrum including our so-called national leaders. Their obnoxious behavior seems to be making hateful behavior towards anyone that's "different" more socially acceptable across the population in general. I've tried to ignore it, but that's impossible unless you disconnect completely and become an uninformed off-the-grid hermit, which I refuse to do.

But, I now have a new tactic to battle the negativity, whatever the source.  I no longer fear letting it in.  I realize that I just need to actively seek out enough positive to push the negative to the side.  I steadfastly believe there's more positive in the world than negative. It may be harder to find as it doesn't sell subscriptions or generate web-site hits, but I know it's there and I'm confident I'll find it.

I hope you can too.

The following song, "First Light", was inspired by Lindsey's journey from negative to positive.  Thank you for sharing your story with us so beautifully!  It's something we all can draw inspiration from.